Updated 3 months, 4 weeks ago

6 Sings you're hanging out with a fake friend

1. The fake friend always uses specific, choice words to make you feel good for no real reason. And it’s all nothing but flowery bullshit especially since a normal human would use simple words. “I couldn’t have done it without you” comes to mind. Another one would be, “I actually considered you for the role”. Noticed how talk is created after all is already actually said and done. Hence, notice how talk is cheap? The fake friend exploits this. He knows that words are easy to make and can be used to manipulate unassuming people.

2. They’ll be friends with you, party with you and drink with you on the weekends. But when you need help with something boring and chore-like, such as moving into your elevator-less fourth floor apartment in the middle of August, they’re nowhere to be found. Watch.

3. The fake friend always exaggerates everything and borders on lying to make himself look good: That is when you’re like, “Hey, that’s not what happened.” And then he turns the whole group against you as he makes the joke about you. This happens way too often to many people, but we tend to brush it off even though it actually bothers us. Don’t put up with this shit, especially if the joke’s on you. There’s a limit to how much noise an empty vessel should make. Don’t make up excuses for a friend. Be with friends you don’t have to question at all.

4. If a person talks about you behind your back. Of course, if you’re talking to them face-to-face it’s hard to know that they’re talking about you specifically. But if they spend a lot of time gossiping to you about other people, it’s not a coincidence.

5. The fake friend makes it easy: Come on man. Deep down you know your friend is fake. It’s that nagging feeling telling you that your friend really isn’t your friend. “He annoys me”, “I guess I can tolerate him a bit more…”, “Oh he’s actually a good guy” or “I’m not sure why I always hang out with him, but oh well” come to mind. The signs are all there. No one is dumb enough to not see it. But because you want to seem like a good person, you justify way too much for the fake friend; you always give the benefit of the doubt. That being said, the fake friend is hence also dumb because he thinks he can get away with it.

6. The fake friend is overly nice to everybody: Being nice is cool. Being overly nice is not. It’s common sense. You just know that there’s a chock full of hidden agendas somewhere there. I’m not just talking about people who are only being nice to get a favour in return, but do you see that overly nice people fall under not following up on anything? Perhaps they lack the balls to say no, but whatever it is, the fake friend has crossed the line into becoming fake as they don’t know the consequences of being a Yes Man to everyone as they think they can get away with being nice through words only.

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