Updated 1 month, 1 week ago

3 ways to start making yourself a priority

In a way, pleasing others is an easy way to ignore our self. We can fill our mind with the fantasy that caring so much for others means that our self-contentedness is so great that we can afford to spare all that time thinking about, and tending to, others. Maybe not.

Although making our loved ones and even strangers smile is a talent to develop and share, we also need to be self-sufficient.

"Me" time is not something you should feel guilty about. It's nothing more than taking some time to put aside your everyday business and treating yourself to an activity that you enjoy. It gives you an opportunity to relax, refocus and recharge. And when you do that, you can come back to your responsibilities with greater focus, commitment and enjoyment.

Let`s look at 3 ways to start making yourself a priority:

1. In your relationship put yourself first by keeping your individuality alive and thriving even as you become entwined with your partner. You deserve and need as much of your own attention as your partner does. Getting consumed in your relationship by focusing on pleasing your partner and neglecting yourself means that two people are working on sustaining only one. The second person, you, becomes lost. Suddenly, the relationship no longer works because you’ve lost one part of the whole.
Put yourself first by knowing and nurturing who you are beyond your relationship. Use some of that love-drive to please yourself, just yourself, without your partner. Have a night out with your friends. Go to the gym. Never miss your once-a-week French class.

2. Evaluate the things that are wasting your time each day. Do you check your emails constantly and end up spending more time on your computer than you planned? Do you answer personal calls in the middle of your workday? Run to the supermarket daily to pick up dinner rather than plan in advance and shop once? If this sounds like you, you must take the time to organize your responsibilities, and you will gain more free time than you can imagine. Also, you must learn to say "no" to requests to do things that you don't really want to, don't value or don't bring you satisfaction and joy.

3. Create a daily ritual. Ask yourself what makes you happy. Reevaluate your priorities. Just be with yourself and see how you’re doing, really. Then set aside time each week to do at least 2 of the things that you know have the biggest impact on your personal happiness. This can be a bath, listening to music, taking a walk or meditating. Make it something you can look forward to.

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