This type of emotional dependency usually affects many women. We tell you what it is.
The Woman Post | Ariel Cipolla
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Women interested in a married man may be suffering from Fortunata Syndrome. In the field of psychology, this is a type of emotional dependency that many women develop when it comes to their love tastes.
Its origin goes back to the Spanish writer Benito Pérez Galdós. In one of his novels, known as "Fortunata and Jacinta," the main character suffered from this same problem. That is to say, Fortunata believed that she should take away the husbands of the others. She suffered from a problem that incited her to intervene in other people's relationships.
More specifically, it is a pattern of behavior that causes them to be attracted to married men. That is, women who suffer from it are constantly interested in men who are with other women. This situation is not "true love," but an obsession that explains internal problems.
In other words, Fortunata Syndrome is one of the explanations for women who have low self-esteem. Women who suffer from this type of dependence often seduce married men. The goal? To feel relevant, because they are capable of "breaking up a couple," but this has a deeper connotation.
That the woman, who has self-esteem issues, feels truly important. The logic goes like this: If the man is willing to cheat on his wife with her, it is because she is "better." Therefore, the Fortunata Syndrome bases its functioning on the comparison.
In some cases, we can see this in women who consider themselves inferior to other women. The explanation for this phenomenon may lie in society. For example, with the contrast of bodies. Some idealized bodies make many women feel "less" than others.
Therefore, they look for different ways to match or surpass them. Fortunata Syndrome is one of these ways. For example, if a woman is "envious" of another woman's body, she probably knows that she will not be able to achieve that physique.
However, she evaluates it as a challenge to herself. She wants to prove to herself (and also to the other person), that she is capable of falling in love with a married man. Some of them do not even want to get married, but only seek to interfere with the couple. That is, they want to feel like a "temptation" for the man.
Common Characteristics of This Syndrome
There are very common characteristics of this syndrome. Mainly, they stand out:
-A feeling of intense and persistent love for a married man.
-Recurrence of interest in men who already have partners.
-No interest in single people.
-Ambivalent feelings toward the other woman. That is, they may hate her, envy her, but also feel sorry for being part of the deception.
-Fantasies about the future. It is common for men who do not think of leaving their wives to stay with their mistresses. However, their mistresses wait and dream of that time to come.
It is relevant to mention that this disorder is not synonymous with love. In reality, the attraction is not to the man, but to herself. The woman who suffers from Fortunata Syndrome does not want to be with that man but seeks to feel better about herself. That is to say, it is a resource that she uses to raise her self-esteem.
Many women know that this is an "impossible love." That is, they tend to fall in love with men who would never be with them or would never have anything more than a one-night stand. Therefore, it is associated with those platonic idealizations. However, in this case, it is not with single people but married.
From psychology, this masochistic desire of women may have its origin in an unresolved Oedipus. That is, the woman seeks to compete with another woman, something that occurs in childhood. That is when the girl feels her mother is a competitor for her father's love. However, as she grows up, she buries those feelings... or not, as in this case.
To address this problem, it is relevant to improve self-esteem. Many of the worldviews that women have about other women are rooted in societal impositions or archetypes. However, there may also be unresolved conflicts from childhood. That is why it is essential to cut with this dependent personality. This will allow you to have a real and non-idealized perspective of love.